The Best New Console Isn't What You Think

The Playstation 4 and Xbox One have been on sale for a few weeks now, and both have put up record-breaking numbers. Before the end of December, they'll both have sold millions of units each. Their impressive hardware and cutting-edge software features offer experiences and BLAH BLAH BLAH.

I didn't buy a next-gen console. I had a PS4 preordered since E3, but cancelled it due to a shortage of both money and fucks to give. Neither console gives me much incentive to buy right away. I don't need a new box to play Netflix and Call of Duty with a few more polygons. I'm going to wait until the games I really want are close. Metal Gear Solid 5: Ground Zeroes, Watch Dogs, Infamous, and The Order: 1886 are high on my list of most anticipated games, so a PS4 would be collecting dust for the next few months until they come around.

People are talking a lot about the battle for supremacy between the PS4 and Xbox, but they're all picking a losing side. The console I'm really excited for offers something far more unique than either next-gen box. I am of course talking about the Hyperkin RetroN 5.

The Void in My Life that is Persona 4

The new consoles have arrived and already put up record-breaking sales numbers, and I wasn't around to give two shits about either of them. I've got a new graphics card in my PC, and I'm looking forward to an alternative gaming console that I'll talk more about later. However, by passing on next gen, November was by no means a money-saving month for me. I celebrated my 19th birthday, and got some cash from my family (because it's easier than explaining to them what I want). Along with the graphics card (and some awesome free games that came with it), I went to Gamestop and picked up the new Zelda and Pokemon games for 3DS.

Unfortunately, none of this matters. I haven't played a second of either of my new Nintendo games, and my PC mostly sits collecting dust. This is because I also picked up Persona 4 Golden for my Playstation Vita. That game has consumed most of my free time and, with the semester coming to an end, has been a cataclysmic disaster for my grades.

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I didn't anticipate playing this much of the game. I've never been a very big fan of JRPGs, and didn't know a lot about it. All I know is that it's been on my radar for a while since it's on virtually every "Must-own Vita Games" list on the internet, and I needed a third game to meet the criteria of the "buy 2, get 1 free" deal, so I bought it.

My first clue should have been when an employee at Gamestop got incredibly excited for me purchasing the game when he saw me checking out. He said he put over 90 hours into it and that it's his favorite JRPG. That didn't carry much meaning to me, but I was still looking forward to it when I went home and started up.

I have never underestimated how much I would enjoy a game in my entire life.

That game is utterly fantastic. The combat is rich and deep, yet easily accessible and quick to learn, something not a lot of RPGs get right nowadays. Battles are wicked fun, and you can choose to either let your battle party attack on their own or control them yourself (I of course chose the latter). Collecting and fusing Personas is like a grown-up's version of Pokemon, and I'm always trying to level up to unlock new abilities for myself or my crew. The game is always open to hours of grinding in any of your previously conquered dungeons (which are sometimes saunas and strip clubs), which I never thought I could enjoy. The only time I think I've welcomed grinding in a game is Pokemon, but Persona gives so much more incentive. Defeated enemies drop sidequest items, gems and loot which you can sell or, better yet, take to the town blacksmith (right next to the tofu shop and the gas station, like in every small town) so he can make them into new, more powerful weapons and armor.

Outside of the great combat system, Persona is a delightful Japanese life sim. You make lots of friends at your new high school, which is significantly less terrifying and stressful than what I've heard about Japanese education. You form relationships, go on dates, and solve mysteries with the hilarious crew you've assembled. This game is loaded with fully-voiced dialogue, and has made me laugh out loud several times, which is really weird considering that I'm almost certain Persona 4 is not Portal 2.

After a couple of weeks with the game I'm already over 40 hours in, which from my research is only about halfway through the main story. Frankly, that isn't long enough. I never want Persona 4 to end. It's already one of my favorite games, and I can't put it down for the life of me.

The Top 5 Shotguns in Video Games

The shotty. The scattergun. The howitzer. The spreadgun. The blasty-you-in-halfsie. For as long as video games have featured guns (Read: Always), the most coveted and sought-after weapon by the gaming masses has always been the shotgun. You can't blame them; the shotgun has consistently been the most devastating and efficient digitized firearm since people were fighting over a big letter 'S' in Contra.

As tribute to the close-range killer, I've put together the list of the five best shotguns in my gaming history.

Why I Cancelled My Playstation 4 Preorder

Well, all of my hopes and dreams have gone to shit.

I preordered my Playstation 4 the day after the Sony press conference at E3. Do you remember that fucking press conference? Remember when Jack Tretton laid the smack-down of the century on Microsoft? It was such a harsh beating that the Xbox One is basically a completely different console from the one shown at E3. I think I remember a few "yo mamma" jokes in there too, but I digress. I was beyond hyped for the PS4. The exclusives, the graphics, the price. It was all perfect. I was ready. My body was ready.

And then they delayed Watch Dogs.

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Okay, I had been rethinking my preorder just a little before that news broke. Was it worth spending $400 for a box that plays really pretty shooters that wouldn't have many very significant titles until Spring? Probably not, but Watch Dogs was my system-seller. It was next-gen is every discernible way. It was incredibly ambitious for an open world game, and looked completely unlike any game that has come before it. My PC was quickly becoming a relic of a bygone era of Far Cry 3's and Hitman: Abolutions, and Watch Dogs finally signaled my exit from the fantastic illusion of the "PC Master Race."

I was still holding on to my reserve for dear life. They still have Killzone and Call of Duty, I thought. Those are just shooters with new engines, nothing worth buying a new console for. What about Knack? Knack? Are you serious? Shut up, brain. Fuck you, Mike. NO FUCK YOU, BRAIN. The real blockbuster games like Destiny and Infamous aren't coming until a few months after the console's release. What about Driveclub? That game looks awesome, and it's FREE. Hey, yeah, you're right brain! Driveclub looks rad as hell! I'll get that and- oh wait never mind that got cancelled too.

So I went to Gamestop and cancelled my preorder.



I was inconsolable. My next gen dreams were gone... until a few months from now when Watch Dogs comes out. All I had was a gaming PC, every current-gen console, and an extra $100 lining my pockets. What was I to do?

Oh, hey there beautiful.

Hey Everyone!

Congrats, nerds! You've discovered my new blog, Bowbi Plays! I made this blog to write whatever the hell I want about whatever the hell I want.

Okay, it's mostly going to be video games.

Video games have been a part of my life for as long as I can remember. I remember the day my mom took my sister and I to the store to get a Nintendo 64. I remember when I was in the hospital with some as-of-yet unidentified flesh-eating bacteria and my parents got me a GameBoy Color (yeah, I had been pestering them for months to get me one and the only thing that convinced them was a new and unknown threat to my life). I remember Christmas in 2001 when my Uncle gave me Pokémon Crystal Version, the best game of all time and THERE WILL BE NO FURTHER DISCUSSION ON THE MATTER.

The thing is, I don't want to end up some entitled millenial playing games and taking nothing redeeming from them. I want to learn and grow and share the most incredible mass medium in the world with other people.

I'm going to be spending whatever free time I have writing here. I'll be giving my impressions, opinions, and my vain attempts at humor over whatever games I want. I'll be writing reviews for games new and old (because I'm too broke to afford every new $60 game), my thoughts on current events in the industry, and maybe throw in a couple of gameplay videos.

I'm doing this because I love writing, and I love video games. I love them so much that I want to make a career out of it, and this is the first step. I want to become as good at this as I can possibly be, and I want you to help me. Tell me what you think. Tell me what you want in a writer. Hit me if you have to, I don't mind.

It's not going to be easy. The thing is, nobody ever told me it was - in fact they've been telling me the exact opposite - and that's exactly why I want to do it.

Thank you.